:+:~ThE PeRsOn WhO ToOk My BrEaThE AwAy~:+:

Tuesday, April 25, 2006
6:31 PM

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yay~!! new blog created!! how's it how's it?!?! gosh... nice right?? aww... i know it is... hahax... i spent quite some time hoping around blogs... collecting different stylish method of decorating the blog and fix them together... like those snow flakes... hahax... i took dem from my previous blog actually... LOLX~ ^^

hmmm~~ geex.... tell u 1 more something about miie.. i do have some hearing problem... lolx... socialogy class... go on laughing if u wan to k? i had laughed my heart out about this silly joke i made outta myself... its more about debating today in socialogy class... and all of a sudden... we started talking about terrorist... as the main topic's somehow linked to killings... one student made a comment... *plz be sure yur not having any food in yur mouth while reading... i've choked myself on my own saliva on these...* "Osama Bin Laden thinks its right..." and u know wad i've heard?? i've mistaken the whole sentence as "Oh... Someone in London thinks its right..." wad about it?! LOLX... the whole class laughed their asses out... and look... i've changed... and being sporting enuff to join the class and laugh mine out too... hahax... but its close right?? geex... a lil too exaggerating... hahax...

well... things in poly is really moving great... although as usual... i haven't made much frens yet... but that doesn't really matter... in fact... i don't care... jus simply don't want to repeat the history in my sec sch years... noted that i've always emphasized on these... sigh* really had left a great impact on miie though... the pros and cons on these too... cant believe it eh?? oh well... hMmMm~~ listening to Britney tru my discman now.. chillx... quite a nice song too.. although a lil outdated... ^^ alright... i'm back to my studies now already... for yur info.. i'm still in school now... hahax... there's this... computer lap wif more than hundreds of computer... wad'd u think? almost the size of the canteen in my secondary school... lolx... signing off now... ^^

Monday, April 24, 2006
2:39 PM

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a new chapter of life begins... a new route and a whole new world for miie... i've revealed myself to a very different world in poly... unlike primary and secondary... teachers are those who had difficulties in finding classes... now... its both teachers and students are having difficulties... i will get used to these... i know i will... for how am i going to persue my further studies... i yet to know.. answers are bound to be found in my progress... i will definitely work hard... achieving my dreams... dreams... no... i have no dreams... those are goals... i will reach them... achieving my goals... are now more harder than usual... from primary industry, where we took up the course of spoon feeding.. to secondary industry where both the mixture of spoon feeding and independence comes into play... and finally... now... the tertiary studies... total independence... future really does lies in my hands... it had all become more realistic than ever now.. wad will i become in the next 10 years?? in actual fact... i donnoe myself... i'm moving a step at a time... like a lost boat in the Atlantic Ocean... all i hope is.. to find an island... for survival... tat... is all.. time really flies... to tell u i'm 18 this year myself... its quite hard... for i don believe that myself... till then... we shall see... see wad i shall be in 10 years time... see wad i wud and will become... wadeva it is... i hope things wud come out fine... wish miie luck... all the best to all of u too... ^^

Thursday, April 20, 2006
10:21 PM

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geex... wads wrong wif today anyway??? its too great... simply... too much of a "too" to believe... poly school does rock my life out of shape... and i'm convinced wif that now... still remember miie being a stage manager in sec 5, in drama??? i'm back in my old ways today... directing my group and improving their acting skills... part of my... er... sorry... not my... is OUR project... gosh... although the leader's not miie... the whole group of mine rox!! to even think i've being so close to regretness when i've acknowledged and accepted the fact that i've being forced to change to another group... confused now??? specifically, i'm wif yun's group... and i've got switched to another through the playing of lots... (how childish) i'd have call it unluckyness that time... but i'd say... i've changed my mind now... ever imagining the feel of falling mentally from a mountain to the ground, bouncing off again for... probably a metre or so b4 laying stagnant on the ground?? i'm the opposite now... probably having some hard time braking when i've reached the mountain... my whole group had being so proactive... everyone reacting and responding so effectively... giving out suggestion as crazy as anyone cud go... when i actually doubt so of anything like it b4 getting into these project thingy... i'm amused... y'noe??? my guess's because i'm really anti-social... or probably becuz i'm stereo-typing... most of my group members aren't singaporean... one from China, one from Philipines... one from Bel-ma(donnoe wads tat country... but its being pronounced that way)... leaving wif only 2 singaporeans including miie in the group... and nonthelss... as usual... i'm the only guy there... again... but look... i really enjoyed that discussion today... i had all the attention i needed... unlike secondary school years... and god... please... jus keep it this way and maintain it.. nothing changes... please... ><"

geex... weird things' happening and its today when i noticed it... while reading on my way home... what's the clever idea of having lamposts along the whole long of pavement and without having them on??? not that i have diffculties walking... but i have diffculties reading while walking... dratz... i've slipped on *unseen* lil stairs for the 3rd time in my progress of home as my destination...

and gosh... do u know Coca-Cola has a PH level of 2.5 and drinking 12L of it at one shot can dissolve your bones??? i've read that from Karen's blog today... and hell miie... i've seen her online today... surprise... amusement... geex... i'll be hoping for more as life goes on... let's jus... hope so... ya??

=.=!! i've jus said that, didn't i?? sigh* jus got naggings from my dad again... hell miie.. i wished to go on.. y'know... guess i cudn't leave my day without having at least one sigh outta my mouth... here's another one... SiGh*

Tuesday, April 18, 2006
11:45 PM

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geex... i've jus reviewed part of the blog entries i've had for the last year... hahax... i've being so childish... 1st of july 2005... i cried in school... chillx... imagining the whole situation there again... its like as if the whole situation's happening again... imagine the embarrassment i'm having... the actions i've gestured... specific details... gosh... i cant believe i've broad over such small matters before... bet u guys mus be very interested eh?? hahax... someone strolled passed miie and called miie an ass hole was the first event.. followed by the usual cases of miie getting *bullied*... for that time... purposely being knocked onto, almost causing miie to fall... getting laughed at again by the same class or in fact... all class from that level... particularly, 5e1, 5e2 and 5e3.. go ahead and think i'm exaggerating if u want to... or probably think that i'm desperately needing some sympathy... i don need them... mark my words... or even, i don WANT them... obstacles... which doesn't kill miie, only makes miie stronger... how's that?

yun says i'm anti-social... auntie(jess's mum) said that i'm quite apprehensive probably... well... only to jess's mother here, i feel she's trying to be sweet here... probably wanting to console miie a little... well.. if that's her purpose of it, yah, she succeeded...

i'm not delibrately not taking any frens in... its jus... gosh... how'd i explain... i'm jus afraid things wunt go the right way again... or the way that i wanted at least... i didn't want things that happened in the secondary school years to happen again in the poly years... and if it does... den no point starting anew... as that, on starting anew... was what i'm always looking forward for when i got knowledge tat i'm being selected as 1 of the Nanyang student... call it low self-esteem if u wud... i have no confidence in myself... and so honestly here, i admit it.. if Poly were to have the same outcome as wad my sec school years had given miie on the topic of frens... believe miie... i'll go nuts... really... go insane... when stupidity actually really enters the world of mine... i'll go to the extend of doing things u wunt believe i'll do... expect the unexpectables till then...

lets analyse this den... simple enough... or probably, is what i want... making things as simple as it goes or come... if doing things my way in my sec school years had given miie the negative effect of the outcome.. i jus have to do the same thing the opposite way to have the positive outcome... right?? okay.. cool... tats it... i'll jus see how long i can last wif this den... all i hope.. gosh... pray hard nigel.. for 3 years... life's gonna be as easy as u think it is... and who told miie that?? karen... its u... eh? lolx... look... i jus really hope that my 3 years in poly wud be the best out of the 3 stages(primary, secondary, teritary) of life i've being to... apart from that... i've always wanted to be a top student of anything... think i'll do it?? don tell miie... cuz i know fully wad the answers are... jus give miie the chance to daydream a lil for now... sigh*

when things doesn't go my way.. all i cud do is... go their way... right? or i'll be known as the invader of the unique singapore alien of NYP already... the best thing to do... or the cleverest thing to do... is don do anything at all... or tell miie... do u have any better ideas den...?

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geex... this wud be the second day in school already... time really really flies... sigh* look... and at the other blink of an eye... it wud already be the pass of the 3 years... geex... wadeva i'll be at the point of time... ><" really... of course anyone wud wish for the bestest best for themselve eh? hahax... wadeva... sigh*

3:11pm now... and its like... 50 more mins for the next lesson to start... i've met jonathan today though... y'noe... the jonathan always wif yun and jess... awww... gosh... his height... gosh... felt quite insulted standing right next to him... (now to imagine how short i really am) ---> (don make miie smack u... =.="") hahax... but really.. like Ivan, he's really easy going... felt really fun to talk to him though... hahax... helped him abit on his survey and he thanked miie like i've saved his life... i'm not exaggerating kay... if u actually think i am.. hahax... but... overall.. yah... he's a cute fellow... keep a good lookout on him eh?? hahax... jus don try to miss him out in a party or wadsoever... hahax... alright.. signing off...

Thursday, April 13, 2006
8:52 PM

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i never know how its like.. y'noe.. the pinch of missing a person... well... now i know... geex... and its not nice... really.. not nice at all... maybe being missed wud be a better choice though... its rather complicated alright... i donnoe how to put it to words... there's this urge while missing a person... this desperacity... on the need, a must even... to see him/her as soon as possible... its like... he/she's a source of oxygen... tat if one don see him/her asap... oh hell miie.. wad am i talking about?? forget it.. u'll understand when u're in love.. i guess...

orientation today... total crap if u wud ask miie... i slept about thrice in a row for 2 times in the auditorium while listening to the speeches... u wudn't believe it though.. i'm actually FIGHTING to keep myself awake... i'm a lamer... the only time i'm fully awake was the time "show" starts... under the category of entertainment... and after that?? i'm back in the progress in counting sheeps... but this time.. not to try to sleep.. but to try to keep myself awake...

orientation's from 8:30am to 5:30pm... obviously its not all about speeches eh?! ya... i mean... half of the day is... till when we started on those ice breaking games... geex... sigh* yah... those games managed to keep miie awake though... but gosh... if... IF i mean... if... all the games are located in 1 destinated station... try miie... i'll be either sleep walking or sleeping while standing... we explored almost half of the whole school for those games are separated to several different stations... (which simply doesn't give comfort to my legs) and its not like the games are fun y'noe... not much of thinking games or games in action... examples?? u wunt want to know too.. i guess... lolx... "Human Bingo" where we wud represent the numbers itself and wait for our numbers being drawn... i'm only entertained by the joker i have as the orientation leader for us though... otherwise?? we'll jus have to wait for our numbers being called and den... turn ourself to squarting position from our standing position... sigh* the second example... worse... we're playing scissors paper stone... =.=!! oh great... no much simple rules to go by though... if u wud call that kinda games fun... yah.. probably to primary school kids eh?? look.. i guess even some of them wud complain like jus i do alright...

i wish... i'll not be complaining like tat again when school starts formally... i cant wait y'noe.. i cant.. the first chapter to be studied... the first assignment to be issued... i cant wait for monday to come...

alright.. tats all though... i'm going blog hopping now...

and geex... to all teenage youngsters... no wonder teachers always discouraged students to have BGR while in secondary school years... or even.. while studying... its really distracting.. sometimes... irritating... i've not much experienced though... but its the side impact i'm kinda having now... don even think about it y'noe.. if Aces are part of yur goal... hahax... well... i understood whiie teenage youngsters sighed more often than elderly ppl does already... abit slow i am... yah... ><"

Tuesday, April 04, 2006
11:58 PM

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look... don't be fooled by miie... and don't be fooled by the mask i wear... for i wear a mask, i wear a thousand masks, masks that i'm afraid to take off, and none of them is miie... pretending is an art that is 2nd nature with miie, but don't be fooled...

i give the impression that i'm secure, that all is sunny and unruffled with miie, within as well as without; that confidence is my name and coolness is my game; tat e waters are calm and tat i'm in command and i need no one... but don't believe it; please... don't...

i idly chatter with you in the suave tones of surface talk... i tell u everything tat's really nothing, nothing of what's crying within miie... so when i'm going through my routine, don't be fooled by what i'm saying... please listen carefully and try to hear what i'm not saying; what i'd like to be able to say; what, for survival, i need to say but i can't say... i dislike the hiding... HoNeStLy~~ i dislike the superficial phony games i'm playing... in fact... i disliked myself...

Monday, April 03, 2006
8:04 PM

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today... the day i've met Ivan... a new friend... the whole thing was going out with jess, yun and him for a movie...

and look... i feel kinda a lil different from him... probably them... all three of them...

hahax... morning... bad start of the day... it was "pre" planned that i'm supposed to meet jess at 12:30pm.. and guess the time i woke up... i woke up at 12:41pm... well... guys out there... don start throwing empty bottles at miie jus yet... i slept at 3:30am alright... ><" hahax...

well... ask miie whiie i'm going... simple answer... i don want to stay at home... oh well... although its things like going around window shopping.. or even catching a movie... which'll really really create an explosion to my wallet... it doesnt matter much... as long as im not home... the idea itself.. really... ><" furthermore... i've left myself out of the movie thingy... saving miie another amount... it took guts though... to tell Ivan... whiie i disliked watching movie... in Singapore that is... i feel so pathetic telling him honestly... well look.. if i have some any other ideas up in my sleeves tat i cud tell him... i wud.. but look.. i don... sigh* even on eating... Ivan was recommending resturants which's more than $5 for 1 meal... geex... if i tell him... that $5 could last miie for TEN days in my secondary school years... for 50cents/day... trust miie... i don think he'll believe in such a state... he'll think im exaggerating and being desperate for sympathy... oh well... he don know miie well enuff... hahax.. and neither do i... i rather let him read like this than jus to tell him straight directly too though... leaves miie some pride to keep... i mean... on financial matters... oh well.. forget it... i'm really pathetic... and u don have to tell miie that.. i know that...

another thing that bugged miie... =.=!! some really small issues... *how MUCH more sensitive could i still be* Ivan actually counted the days which rained continuously... geex... simply meant he too hated raining eh?? stop wondering or staring at this... look... i'm total opposite... i've being begging for it to rain... RAIN!! yes... rain... god knows whiie i'm like this... imagining walking in a street... sun shines... and suddenly... it starts to rain... ppl wud run for cover... so badly that they wud choose to sacrifice their bags or even books to keep them as dry as possible...

look.. if its miie... *plz don ask miie whiie on these..* instead of increasing my speed... i'll even slow down..

i'm different from them... yes... sigh* geex... Ivan even though that i'm from America... through the way i speak... which Jess said its like.. a fake ascend... look... geex... hell miie.. i really CANT help it... its jus the so very miie... i speak like that... i'm not acting... not at all... really... oh well... sarcastically... how much more unique cud i still be... no wonder... i havent much friends...